Still Haven't Found...

Back in the days when I lived on the other side of the country, I used to go to a pagan shop. One day, while there, I ran across a neat product: it was a silver (well, silver-colored, no clue what metal it actually was) pentagram, 2.5-3 inches in diameter. Being as I am fascinated by miniatures and pocket kits, it occurred to me that such a thing would be lovely for inclusion in a sort of pocket altar. But at the time I was poor and did not buy it, and I've never seen another like it since. Since then, my discovery of Project A.R.E.S. has only strengthened my desire to have a pocket altar, but I've found myself stymied; no one seemed to sell the pentacle I liked, nor even one of a suitable size in some other design.

Except that the Internet is a wonderful thing, and I've found a site that sells something that, if it's not exactly the same item, is at least a close relative. They've also got one that's solid which I rather like, and another with a rather nice Celtic design. The site in general has all sorts of cool stuff, too, though their selection of chalices does not offer what I want (plain blue glass, "Holy Grail" shaped, no etching, pewter fittings, jewels or clear glass).

I could fit the pentacle in one of these tins, and use one of the blue glass bottles for the portable chalice; a sword and a wand are going to be harder (Abaxion has all sorts of wands I adore, but they're all too large), but I'll bet I can work something out...

Beginning to Look a Lot Like...

I'm a little ambivalent about the holiday season this year. On the one hand there's the problem every non-Christian has: Christmas is just everywhere, and it's not my holiday. But my mother doesn't know that, so I have to keep up appearances. This would be easier to deal with were it not for the fact that I don't really have anyone to have Yule with either; Luke's a sort of spiritual agnostic, in the Heinleinian "I don't know Who's cranking, but I'm pleased They don't stop" kind of way, and every other pagan I've met in this area is a flake, a jerk, or both. And I don't even have an altar up yet. That may have to be #1 on my hit list for the weekend.

But hey, I bought fabric last night for my "Advent" calendar. Not that I'm going to have something I can use this year, but I'm at least getting the ball rolling. It's hard to resist when the lovely green velvet is on sale for 1/3 its normal price.

Five Little Pumpkins

Luke wants to get a fake pumpkin to make the jack o'lantern out of this year.

How do I phrase "Honey, you have snookered me into a fake Yule tree with this bullshit 'pine allergy' of yours, I am not having a fake jack o'lantern too" without sounding harsh?

Empty

The problem is, I want something I'm not getting. I want spirituality; I want to be able to say things like "Note to self: do not leave body parts on the astral plane" without feeling silly about it; I want a feeling of connection, which is after all the essential meaning of the religion--that's the same lig- as in "ligament" or "ligature".

I need an altar, so I can have a place where my tools can go that I don't have to worry about Freya deciding she needs to find out what's up there right now pls kthxbai. I need a robe, because one of the ways to let your unconscious know that you're about to do something special is to dress in a special way. I need candles and smudge sticks. I need to know they're out there, the Lady and the Lord, waiting to come to me in the way in which I call upon Them--because a nurturing mother is a great thing, but sometimes you need Her to kick ass and then it's probably better to invoke Athena than Hera; Nepthys is a lovely lady but Sekhmet will take care of some sorts of business much faster.

I need Them to be there and right now They're not, and if I fake it long enough maybe They will be. It's the best I've got at the moment.

A Little Space

It is perhaps time to go back to Ikea and see if they have the table I want back in stock.

Fire Am I

I really need an altar. I really really need an altar. I need somewhere where I can put things and not worry that the cats are going to decide that that spot is exactly where they need to land after making a spectacular flying leap and I need to have some stability about where I put all my shit in general.

Perhaps I ought to go to Ikea and get something table-like. Preferably with shelves and/or drawers. I can paint, it'll work.

Holiday! Celebrate!

I missed Lughnasadh (August 1, the first harvest festival) again this year because I was out of town and didn't think about it. Bad, bad me. Especially since where I was is really one of the better places on Earth to be a pagan.

I should really get my ass in gear and set up a proper altar. I might be able to get over the "wow this is silly" feeling with some practice.